employed.

“Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.” Romans 12:13
I read this verse today and it immediately reminded me of what I get to do for a living. What a blessing it is to help those in need on a daily basis.

I’ve officially been employed for a month, and I’ve got things to say. In case you weren’t aware, I work for a non-profit organization as a case manager. I have a caseload of 50 clients who all have some sort of mental illness.

It’s so strange because it is not at all what I saw myself doing and it’s not at all what is within my comfort zone. But it is so obviously where I’m supposed to be.

I joke that God applied for this position for me because while I applied for multiple positions at my organization, I didn’t apply for this one. My application ended up being transferred to my program where I was then called for an interview and then hired.  After six months of job searching, I wasn’t going to say no to a job that quite literally fell in my lap.

And I’m so glad I said yes.

Because it’s been so good. My co-workers are wonderful. I could brag on them for days. The working environment is fantastic. The hours, the schedule, the actual work I’m doing, heck even the dress code is all great. And I get paid! I’m still trying to get the hang of it all and get settled into a routine, but I think I’m going to like (love) it. I really do. I already do.

But I can’t lie and say that it hasn’t been hard. It’s been exhausting. It’s been anxiety-inducing. It’s been frustrating. And I’ve had plenty of “I have no idea what I’m doing” moments. But I know I’m supposed to be here which makes it easier to push through the difficult moments and to work all the more harder to learn faster and better.

God is so clearly pushing me to become a better me through this job because the majority of my job is doing things that would normally make me extremely uncomfortable.

For example: phone calls. I typically hate those. Even with my friends. But I probably make at least 10-20 phone calls a day.

Walking up to people’s doors. Yeah, that gives me anxiety when it’s my friend’s house. Take it up a notch… now I’m walking up to people’s doors who I’ve never met before in sometimes the sketchiest places in the city.

Driving around town. I don’t like driving when I know where I’m going. I’m so directionally challenged. But here I am driving all around the county to places I didn’t even know existed. Sometimes with other people in my car making my anxiety level even worse.

Treatment Team. Okay first of all, I love treatment team. It is so insanely helpful when you’ve got clients with a whole bunch of question marks beside them. It is a much needed time of problem solving. But y’all know discussion is my worst nightmare. Discussion points on the syllabus was the death of me and my grades in college. It has always been so hard for me to speak up in those types of settings. So naturally it’s still a difficult time.

But God is teaching me that I have to press on. I have to overcome my anxiety, awkwardness and fear. I have to do these things that make me uncomfortable because IT’S MY JOB. I have no choice but to do them. It makes absolutely no sense to me why I got this job. But I know God wants me to learn and grow as a person through it. I know it’s where God planned for me to be. If it wasn’t, every door that opened and every moment that lined up perfectly wouldn’t have happened. So, I’m going to keep working as hard as I possibly can.

I thought I’d hate having a job and being a real adult. I really did. I missed college (and still do) and thought there was no way I could experience something better. But God has proved me wrong. I love working. I love helping people through my work. I love having an outlet to pursue my passions. And I genuinely can’t wait to continue moving forward and pressing on.

Some days I don’t want to go to work. Some days I don’t want to wake up at 6:15. Some days I want to give up. Some days go nothing like I planned them to. Some days I’m so exhausted by the end of the day that all I want to do is go home and get in my bed. But most days, I find something to thank God for and keep pressing on. So, that’s what I’m going to keep doing.

“Let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.” Hebrews 12:1

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

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Labels.

You know what I would love? A world without labels. I was thinking about this the other day after another depressing lecture in a Sociology class (I really do love my major, I promise), and I decided that Sociology would be a whole lot less depressing without labels. Because that’s honestly where all the problems begin. That’s where discrimination and oppression start. That’s where the Holocaust began. It’s where violence and hatred and war stem from.

It all starts with labels. Labels quite literally tear us apart.

What if race had never been socially constructed. What if we didn’t call another person fat or ugly. What if we didn’t label someone based on their crime or sin.  What if we didn’t identify ourselves and others by gender, sexual orientation, religion, country, etc. What if we were all just humans. We are all just people. What if we all identified each other based on God’s image and that’s it. What if we forgave. What would happen if beauty didn’t have only one specific look?

Can you imagine? Sociologists would be studying all kinds of wonderful things instead of terrible ones.

Question: why can’t I just say that I love Jesus instead of calling myself a Christian? I mean I can, but if I said that I loved Jesus I would automatically be labeled a Christian in the head of the person I said it to. It’s automatic. This is only one example, but it makes it so obvious how necessary labels are in our world. Do they have to be necessary though?

Labels come with so many stereotypes and baggage. If you are black, you’re supposed to act one way. If you are a woman, you’re supposed to be another way. Then if you’re a black woman, you’re supposed to be something entirely different. But why can’t we all just be human beings? Seriously. Why.

I read a piece by Derrick Bell the other day where he claimed that racism is never going to go away. It’s so true and dark and can be said about sexism, ableism, ageism, whatever else. But racism (and all other “isms”) won’t go away because we’ve created race. I will always see those who look different than me, differently, maybe negatively because race exists. We created racism when we created race. And don’t tell me that race isn’t socially constructed. Yes we look different, but we made it to where skin color is the first thing we notice about someone. We made definitions out of skin color.

I just (disclaimer: this is going to be crazy radical)… I just want to live in a world where there’s no continents, no countries, no races, no labels. Where we are all one unified people. Where we don’t build walls between countries for fear of each other. Where we don’t tell others to leave our home because they don’t belong. Where we don’t tell others that they aren’t welcome. Where we aren’t afraid to be immersed in a different culture because they’re different. Where black people aren’t shot because they’re black. Where I am not commanded to be a certain way because I am a woman. I just want us to be us. Whatever that may be.

Unique but united.

I’ve given up on the fact that this will ever occur unless we can go back in time and change everything. Where’s the Doctor at? Peter Capaldi, could you come pick me up in your Tardis? Let’s go change the world.

But anyway, I look forward to… in fact, I long for the day when I arrive in Heaven where this will be reality. We won’t notice any labels about each other… we’ll just be rejoicing together. Unified. But until then, I will try my best to love everyone and treat everyone like they are human. Like they are me even when they are different than me. Knowing that God loves them just as much as He loves me. Loving them with crucifixion love instead of reciprocal love not expecting anything in return… sacrificing something. Just loving despite of the labels. Loving even though I’ve been socialized to see labels. Choosing to love anyways.

I want to change the world.

“The ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones that do.”

This morning during my drive to school, I was thinking about one of my two main life goals. I want to change the world (the other goal is to write a book- a little more attainable I suppose).

Both are fairly difficult goals especially changing the world. They’re pretty far-fetched, and I’m comfortable with the fact that neither may happen. But I’m not giving up on them even though it’ll be a hard road to both.

So, I was thinking about changing the world. I’m not sure how I want to reach that point. Hence the whole “I don’t know what I want to do with my life” dilemma. But I do know that it’s one of my long term goals. I want to die knowing that I made a difference. I want to feel significant and used in some way. I don’t think this is an uncommon want. Most people don’t want to live their life feeling like what they are doing doesn’t matter. Like it’s pointless. We want it all to mean something. My goal, then, isn’t much different from yours. I just want to see actual significant change happen in response to my efforts, and maybe you do too.

As I was thinking all of this, God popped in. You know, He did that thing where he just jumps into the conversation even though you weren’t really asking Him to. And He says “Hey, it’s not your job to save the world. It’s mine.”

Ouch. Okay, God. But I said “change” not “save.” They’re different. “Survey says… eeeehhhh.”

Maybe they are different, though. They do have different meanings after all, but God knows my heart. He knows my desires, and maybe my desire is to save, not change the world. And He was just reminding me that He already did that 2 thousand years ago. He did it by sending His son, the perfect lamb, to die on a cross while bearing my sin. Sin that includes my desire to take on His role of savior.

Here’s the deal. I can try to change the world, and I intend on doing so. There’s nothing wrong with that, but I can only be successful with God’s help. It’s not a fun realization for my very human “I want to be in control-ness”, but it’s a true one.  I will not be successful unless it is God’s plan, and I trust in Him as I walk through every moment of life.

I’m holding onto Matthew 19:26…

But Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

And Ephesians 2:10…

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

God has a purpose for me. I will be used. Maybe I won’t change the world. Maybe I won’t write a book. But He will use me. He is currently using me. And the same is true for you.

Through all of my goals and the paths to those goals, I should seek to bring glory to Him. If I win at something, it is because of Him. If I lose at something, it is also because of Him. Through all things He is glorified, and that is something I hope I hold onto through all of life’s battles.

All of this doesn’t let us off the hook, though. I still have a gigantic heart for correcting injustices and fighting for justice and equality. It’s something I will forever advocate for and forever work towards hoping to see change… if only in one person’s life. God put this compassion and empathy inside of me, and I’m not going to ignore it just because I can’t do it on my own. Christians are called to help those in need whether you feel as strongly about it as I do or not. So, I’m going to keep on pushing towards my goal, and I hope you do too… whatever your goal may be. Only now, I will keep in mind that I need God to accomplish it, and that no matter what happens… He will be glorified.

Now, what should I write my book about?

June 30th, 2015

I’ve decided that I want to start writing every day. It obviously won’t always be on here (I need to buy a journal), but there’s a lot of stuff going on in my head at all times, and it needs to come out somewhere. I love to write so I’m going to write about all the stuff in my head. It will probably (hopefully) help out with my worry, anxiety and overthinking problems.

 

I found this picture on Pinterest today, and it’s something I really need to remember. I very often search for the approval and applause of the world instead of God. I’m definitely the type of person who likes to feel loved and accepted and while I always have that from God, I instead search for it in more attainable and visible places like the world and the people in it. I find myself holding back from sharing opinions or speaking out because of my fear of not being liked by others, and I’m constantly thinking about what others think of me. I think this sometimes causes me to alter my beliefs and views to match the world’s instead of God’s. And because I tend to stay away from conflict, it’s much easier for me to go along with the world to avoid conflict. Because God doesn’t really argue with me… God’s opinions of me are truly the only thing that matters though, and I need to remember that. I also need to embrace who I am instead of changing myself for the world.

 

I also found this picture which goes along pretty well with that. I’m all against socialization. Seriously, I hate it, but we’re all victims to it. We can’t live in this world without it. But we can definitely do our best to be who we are instead of what the world expects or wants. My Twitter bio says this is me “I’m a sociology major who loves Jesus, the Vols, baseball, coffee, dogs, nerdy stuff, adventures and friends.” That’s definitely accurate, but it’s not ALL of me. I mean we all know that we only put the good (or terrible) parts of our lives on social media. There’s a hole that we pretend doesn’t exist so our friends think our lives are perfect (or tragic). So here’s some random facts about ME. Not what the world wants me to be, but just me. It’s still what I want you to know though… But we can continue working on that.

1. Brushing my teeth with warm water grosses me out.
2. I’m terrible at remembering dates unless they’re birthdays.
3. Speaking of birthdays… my birthday would be my favorite holiday if that was socially acceptable.
4. I LOVE birthdays okay?
5. If Lord of the Rings is on, there’s a 98% chance that I’m watching it… and if it’s not on, I’m also probably watching it.
6. If I had to choose between saving a stranger or saving my dogs, I would probably choose my dogs, and I feel a little bad about it.
7. If they don’t ask for the coupon, I probably won’t give it to them, and I also feel a little bad about that.
8. One of my favorite things is receiving emails and just regular mail.
9. Strong emotions like anger, crying, overly happy/excitement, etc. make me uncomfortable.
10. I think big, lonely trees are beautiful.
11. When I say that I’m crying, I’m probably not actually crying. Because I don’t cry. Like ever.
12. I have an aspiration to do a TED talk, but I know that I would suck at it.

Next up is a post about vacation! So stay tuned for that (after I get home of course).

To end this post here’s a little something that I posted on Facebook a few days ago that I want you to remember…

Dear Person,

Because you are a person, you are valuable. You are loved. You are important. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done or who you are. I’m going to do my best to love you like Jesus loves you. I’m going to do my best to see your worth, value and importance. I’m going to do my best to treat you with kindness every time I come into contact with you. I’m sorry that social media has been filled with hatred and judgement this week.

Love,

Another Person

We’re all Human.

There’s multiple blogs I should write before this one. (Savannah, I PROMISE I haven’t forgotten about your blog idea. It’s coming! Just maybe after finals…) And I’m writing this on my phone. Because it just needs to be out there. Right now. While I’m eating Noodles.

Everyone on this planet is human.

Now, that might come as a shock to some of you based on how you treat people. Some of you treat other people like they’re a piece of garbage. Well they’re not. They’re human. The same thing you are.

I’m a Christian. So maybe that means that I don’t support some lifestyles. That does not give me the right to treat people unfairly and unkindly. It does not give me the right to refuse them medical care or food or water. It just doesn’t. My right as a Christian is to love people. No matter what their gender, race, sexual orientation, religion, socioeconomic status, whatever.

Why have we still not come to a point where everyone loves everyone else and treats them with respect? I don’t know. But I wish it would happen soon.

Hello, I’m a sociology major who is so overwhelmed by the amount of social injustice in the world that I need to rant and tell people about it. I could obviously go way more in depth on this topic but…

I’m also overwhelmed by the amount of work I should be doing instead of this so I’m getting back to it.

Love people. Because God loves you and so do I.

Crime Facts That Make Me Angry Part #1

I’ve been in my Criminology class for about three weeks now (with one of my all time favorite professors), and I kind of love it. But I also kind of hate it. I’ve read four chapters of the book and already found countless facts that make me kind of really angry (at society). So, I’m going to share them with you because if you don’t know them, you should. And they’ll probably make you angry too (maybe). I’m all about people being informed if you haven’t noticed. Also, there’s probably going to be more “parts” to this because… well, I’ve only read four chapters and been in class for three weeks. There’s obviously plenty more.

• By the time you’re 18, you’ve seen approximately 400,000 murders (through media mainly). What. And we wonder why people are so violent. p.s. I love me some crime shows but I still find this stat ridiculous.
• Alcohol is legal. Marijuana isn’t. Guess which one is more dangerous. Alcohol.
• Also, the reason we started making drugs illegal is because different people groups started coming to America addicted to them. We couldn’t just kick them out for no reason. So, we made the drugs they were addicted to illegal and sent them back to their countries. (This totally sounds like I’m all for drug legalization which I’m not necessarily. I have a super complicated view on it so we’ll save that for another blog.)
• The majority of school shooters (who were male) were victims of bullying by others calling them names such as “bookish, artistic, geekish, etc.” This challenged their “masculinity” which caused them to do something to regain that “masculinity” aka shooting people. GENDER ROLES CAUSE SCHOOL SHOOTINGS. (That’s my own conclusion by the way.)
• The South has the highest murder rate and the highest rate of firearm ownership. The Northeast, however, has the lowest murder rate and the lowest rate of firearm ownership. (I mean I don’t want to get into the firearm debate, but these are the facts, people)
• Thirty states consider spousal rape a lesser crime than normal rape. I pray Tennessee isn’t one of those.
• People still think victim precipitated rape is a thing. It’s not, FYI.
• In prison, males partake in prostitution, rape, and other such things, and we’re doing nothing to change this (that I’ve heard of anyway). Isn’t prison a place where crime shouldn’t happen? Except we let it. Makes perfect sense.
• Sexual assaults by intimates (including husbands) are the most common type of rape. (Basically all violent crimes are mostly committed by people the victim knows. And we wonder why people have trust problems.)
• There aren’t shelters for abused men. Only abused women.
• There’s a higher percentage of female victims in child and elder abuse.

And I could probably go on. This is only a small slice of the things I’ve learned since starting this class. I know for a fact that I missed some things that probably made me angry, but this will do for now.

Until next time. Don’t rape, murder or commit any other crime against anyone before Part 2 comes out (or ever…)

Education Inequality

A few days ago, I had the inspiration to write blogs on three different subjects. In the midst of finals week, I didn’t (and still don’t) have time to write any of those. But for some reason, here I am writing one when I should be studying.

1. Adderall use as a study aid
2. Education Inequality
3. Ferguson

Those were the three subjects… This blog is about education inequality because my rantings about adderall probably couldn’t be a decent blog, and I am so not educated enough about Ferguson to even form my opinions on it. But you never know, you might see blogs on those subjects sometime soon.

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Education Inequality.

I really don’t like it. It’s probably second place to gender inequality which if you know me at all… you know I hate it. A lot.

I took a social inequalities class this semester, and while I already knew that education inequality existed, I guess I never really knew the extent of it until we talked about it in that class.

There was this study that Jay McLeod did on two gangs in a school. One was mostly black with one white member and the other was mostly white with two black members. The white gang was extremely violent and sold drugs and were basically like your typical gang. The black gang, though, tried to do well in school, participated in athletics and other things like that. The black gang had high hopes for the future while the white gang expected to be in jail within the next few years. Within the two groups, the only member that did semi-well in life was the white member of the mostly black gang. The two black members of the mostly white gang did the worst out of all them.

Now, you might be saying that this sounds more like a race issue which it is. It’s a race, class and education issue. If I learned anything from that class, it’s that all inequality intersects with each other. I don’t know about you, but I find that scenario ridiculous. It makes me so angry that one person from the group that actually tried in school did well and that person was the only white member in the group. It also makes me angry that the two black members in the group that didn’t try did worse than the white members. Why didn’t the white members do that bad? Why didn’t the black members of the other group do as good as the white member? It’s all about stereotypes, I think. No matter who you are, we all tend to conform to the stereotypes that society has decided for us. I don’t like that. We should all be able to be ourselves without the judgement of society, but that’s for another blog.

The part that I really don’t like about education inequality is the unequal opportunities. Schools in different areas are better or worse off than other areas. Every school should be equal. Within poor communities, school buildings are falling apart, schools don’t have recent textbooks, there isn’t new technology, students don’t have proper lunch (when students are hungry they do much worse than students who aren’t because it’s hard to focus when you’re hungry), and so on. If the funding was equal, this wouldn’t be the case. IQ tests are also unequal. Tests like that ask questions geared towards middle class students who are taught in school proper English. The problem is that in lower class schools, teachers don’t take the time to teach the students proper English. Because of the stereotypes of where these students will end up, the teachers allow them to write in slang which causes them to not know the answers to questions on these tests. What if instead of: A symphony is to a composer as a book is to a (n) _______ (paper; sculptor, musician, author, man) tests said If you throw a dice and “7” is showing on the top, what is facing down? _________ (Seven, snake eyes, box cars, little joes, eleven)… Just think about it. We need tests that are geared towards everyone, not just certain classes or races.

There’s also the problem of well off children being pushed towards college prep classes whereas lower class children are being pushed towards vocational courses. Instead of allowing our children to choose their course in life, we force them to inherit what their parents did or what their situation now is telling them to do. When your family background is telling you whether or not you’ll go to college, we have a problem that needs fixing.

I don’t really know what the solution is. There are many, many different theories out there and any or none of them could be true. All I know is that everyone should have equal opportunity and right now that is certainly not the case. It makes me sad. And angry. And makes me see the privilege I have in being white and middle-class. We all have some sort of privilege whether it be male, white, middle-class, protestant, etc and we all in some way or another take it for granted. Let’s change that. Let’s not take what we have for granted because there are people who don’t have the opportunities we do. They should, but they don’t. Society is messed up, y’all. But be thankful, in spite of that.

Rape, Sexual Assault and Consent

Rape. I’ve been hearing a lot about that word recently.

Rather it be the amount of UT alerts about sexual assaults I’ve gotten the past few weeks (and by the way for all of those who think this is a recent thing, it’s not. These sexual assaults happening on campus have always happened. They are just just now being reported.) or the fact that my sister and I just had a moral conversation about sex and consent for my Philosophy class, and we talked about it in depth in class a few days later or the news exposing all of the YouTubers who have been accused of sexual assault in some form or fashion (http://unpleasantmyles.tumblr.com/post/79455706244/tom-milsom-hexachordal-heres-the-post-olga The master list of everything that’s going on in the YouTube community… it’s crazy). Basically it’s everywhere so I’m going to talk about it.

**Disclaimer: I’m going to talk about this in the men towards women standpoint because that is statistically what happens the most often. I am well aware that it does go the other way. Probably more than we think, but for the sake of this blog I’m going to talk about women being the victims.

I’ve noticed that in the UT alert and the YouTube situations that after one person comes out about it, others follow. A lot of people criticize women for not telling people about it. I’m not going to lie, I am one of those people. I find myself very often angry at the ones who don’t report it to the police, but I’m wrong to be angry. Yes girls should report it or at least tell someone, but they have valid reasons not to. Most of the time they are too scared that the person who did it to them will do something worse if they find out it was reported or the girl is just too traumatized by the event to recount it multiple times during the process of reporting it. Others don’t understand this, though. I don’t understand it. Because we’ve never been there, but I think it’s so important for all of us to sympathize with them and understand and create some sort of safe environment for women to share their stories, and I think that with both of these situations, the environment was created and women have begun to share. That’s the first step.

Now, I think it’s important to establish what rape means. The technical definition is “the unlawful compelling of a person through physical force or duress to have sexual intercourse.” That doesn’t explain much to most people though. Many people think rape is just the act of physically forcing someone to have sex with them. It’s so much more than that. We went through a phase in our history where we said things such as “No means no,” and that’s how we defined rape. This is great except for when the woman is silent. Or isn’t in the state of mind to make an actual decision. Or  is pressured or given no other option but to say yes. So the new thing that is arising is “Yes means yes.” Otherwise known as Affirmative Consent. California passed a state bill very recently saying:

“An affirmative consent standard in the determination of whether consent was given by both parties to sexual activity. ‘Affirmative consent’ means affirmative, conscious, and voluntary agreement to engage in sexual activity. It is the responsibility of each person involved in the sexual activity to ensure that he or she has the affirmative consent of the other or others to engage in the sexual activity. Lack of protest or resistance does not mean consent, nor does silence mean consent. Affirmative consent must be ongoing throughout a sexual activity and can be revoked at any time. The existence of a dating relationship between the persons involved, or the fact of past sexual relations between them, should never by itself be assumed to be an indicator of consent.”

Now, a lot of people argue that this movement makes basically all sex rape. This isn’t true, though. It’s only rape if one of the people involved doesn’t consent to it, and consent means saying yes.

Consent isn’t obtained when:

• Coercion takes place (occurrent (actual harm) or dispostional (threat))
• Deception takes place (lying or not disclosing relevant facts meaning that the person would say no to sex if they knew the fact)
• One or both parties are under the influence of alcohol, drugs, or any other substance causing them to not make accurate decisions
• One is silent
• A previous or current sexual relationship, dating relationship, etc. exists
• Two people are married (spousal rape does exist)
• Consent was given on a previous occasion
• One doesn’t protest physical force
• One’s attire, reputation or acceptance to go to a place seems to suggest something
• One is pressured into giving consent when on normal occasions they wouldn’t

(The list could go on, but I think I’ve made my point.)

It’s important to point out that rape isn’t the only thing that I’m concerned about. I’m also speaking in terms of other types of sexual assault. These include such things as touching someone’s butt or boobs or whatever else. I would even go as far to say as kissing without consent could be considered sexual assault. Anything with a sexual connotation is sexual assault if consent from both people isn’t given.

From a guy’s perspective, I know this probably all sounds absurd. Most guys probably find this ridiculous. Reason being, they don’t think it’s a big deal. They don’t see the harm in most of what I’ve talked about. (Note: I’m not saying all guys think this, but a large number of them do.) They can’t “control themselves.” And a lot of times they get away with it because of these types of excuses. A lot of times the victim is blamed because of such things like what she was wearing. But THAT’S actually what’s ridiculous. A girl never asks for it, ever. And if a man so easily thinks that a girl wants that, he’s wrong, and he needs to evaluate the situation better. So many times a man lets his lust control his actions instead of his brain or more importantly his heart, and that’s where the mistake lies. But it’s not even their fault because our society has taught boys to behave that way. They aren’t supposed to use their heart or emotions. They’re supposed to be strong and forceful and manly. Why can’t they be both depending on the situation?

I think many times men just don’t understand women… and honestly, that could be our own faults. Our society has created this view that men shouldn’t understand women and women shouldn’t understand men, and maybe that’s because we’ve made ourselves so separated through gender roles or maybe it’s not. But either way, it’s a problem. We need to understand each other. If we did, sexual assault wouldn’t happen. So here’s some things that men need to know about women.

1. It is very common for the minority in a group to set a bad example for the actual majority of the group… the women who seem to love being viewed as an object and enjoy being sexualized are few, but because of social media, advertisements, movies, etc. it seems like most women are okay with it. The truth is we’re not. Even some of the women who seem to love it, hate it. So don’t treat us like objects. We’re human too.
2. 99% of the time, we don’t want to make you a sandwich. You’re perfectly capable.
3. Women struggle just as badly with lust as men. Men’s excuse of “we can’t control ourselves.” is one of the most ridiculous excuses I’ve ever heard. (I wrote an in-depth blog about this… https://mikaylaannm.wordpress.com/2014/07/03/women-struggle-too/)
4. I briefly mentioned this before, but women have reasons to not report sexual assault so don’t judge them for not reporting. Just listen and offer to help.
5. Women also have reasons to go back to the person who assaulted them. According to my sister’s Social Work book, some of these are economic dependence, lack of self-confidence, lack of power, fear of the abuser, guilt, feeling isolated with nowhere to go, fear for her children, and love.

Basically, what I’m trying to get across is that something needs to change. According to this video, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=miaiLpGY6O4&list=UUc4yillQaNo6a-iG2PYbbrA (which is really good and you should watch it), 1 in 3 women are sexually assaulted by age 22 and 1 in 6 men are. That’s a lot of people. This can only change if people are aware. Men, women, boys, girls, dogs, everyone. If people knew, something could change. So spread the word. Tell people the facts. Make people care. Share your story.

Why Sociology?

Whenever I say my major is Sociology, there are usually two responses:

1) What are you going to do with that?

or

2) What exactly is Sociology?

I can’t answer the first one. I just can’t because I honestly have no idea.

But I can answer the second one.

so·ci·ol·o·gy
/ˌsōsēˈäləjē/
noun
the study of the development, structure, and functioning of human society.

• the study of social problems.

I like to explain it by comparing it to the other social sciences. Psychology focuses on the individual person whereas Sociology looks at society as a whole. And Social Work is basically a combination of both.

Those questions are usually followed or preceded by something like “Why did you choose that?”

Here’s why:

I came into college not knowing what I was going to major in. I thought about English or French or some sort of social science, but I really had no idea. I eventually came to the point where I was trying to decide between Sociology or Psychology. I took a class of each that semester. The selling point to choose Sociology was how I reacted when we started talking about gender inequality. We watched a documentary called Miss Representation (which everyone should watch) and talked about various other aspects of gender inequality, and it just made me so mad. I’ve come to realize that I am very passionate about gender inequality. It’s one of the only things that makes me actually enraged. And I’ve also realized that other types of inequality (i.e., racial, class, etc.) make me mad too. I’m currently taking a Social Inequalities class, and we aren’t very far into the semester yet, but I do know this. Some inequality in a society is good. In fact, outcomes of situations shouldn’t be equal. We should all be able to end up at different places or life would be pointless. There would be no point in trying to achieve anything if we all ended up equal. BUT we should all have equal opportunity which is something no society has mastered. And that’s what I want. Equal opportunity for women, men, blacks, whites, everyone. Everyone should have a fair chance of being something great. And that’s why I want to be a Sociologist. I have no clue what I’m going to do. I don’t know what kind of job I’ll have. But I do know that I am so passionate about the subject that I can’t not major in Sociology. I have to. Because I want change, and I think that will be the best way to attempt to accomplish it.

And on a kind of but not really unrelated note… Everyone should watch this video. It is just so good. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTG1zcEJmxY